124、If

"If you could cook," said the husband, "we could fire the chef."

"If you could screw," replied the wife, "we could fire the driver."

如果

“如果你会做菜，”丈夫说：“我们可以炒了厨师。”

“如果你会做爱，”妻子答：“我们可以解雇司机。”
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125、Rest

Maria gets married and has 17 children. Then her husband dies.

She remarries two weeks later, and has 22 children by her next husband. Then he dies.

A few weeks later, she dies.

At the funeral, the priest looks skyward.

"At least they're finally together."

"Excuse me, Father," says one of her sons, "but do you mean her and her first husband, or her and her second husband?"

"I mean her legs."

安息

玛丽亚结婚后生了17个孩子。然后他丈夫死了。

两星期后她再嫁，又与第二任丈夫有了22个孩子。然后丈夫又死了。

几星期后，她也死了。

在葬礼上，牧师抬头看天。

“至少他们终于在一起了。”

“对不起，神父，”她的一个儿子问：“你是指她和第一任丈夫呢，还是和第二任丈夫？”

“我是指她的两只腿。”